
<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Today, I learned that a high school classmate passed away while on vacation with her children. Her daughter had fallen into the ocean, and she went in to save her despite the strong current. She saved her daughter, but the ocean took her. The world lost a kind and friendly person, but the heaven gained an angel. I grieve, and we are all grieving in our own ways. Loss of moments and opportunities and shared memories of joy, sadness, and pain. As we said goodbye to her today, I was reminded of a draft post I wrote a few months ago but haven&#8217;t had the time to share, and so today, in her honor, I share with you, with this closing note. </p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">My Pictures in the End</h2>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">I recently met two ladies on a trip, and while everyone was taking pictures of themselves at the attraction sites- they just stood there looking at them. I walked over to them and asked if they wanted me to take their pictures, and I wasn&#8217;t ready for the answer they gave.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">You see, they were in their 80s, and the first thing they said to me was, &#8220;Who&#8217;s going to want them?&#8221; and then I heard, &#8220;We are getting ourselves ready to die.&#8221; I was floored. I think about death sometimes and want to make sure my family is taken care of after I leave this realm; however, I never think about the pictures, the moments of experiences in my life that mean so much to me and hold so many memories will one day not be wanted or welcomed by the loved ones I leave behind.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph"><strong>Who&#8217;s going to want my pictures once I am gone?</strong> I think about the image my uncle and his friends left behind that&#8217;s now placed in the workout room in my basement that occasionally gets used. It is there because it&#8217;s taboo to have pictures of the dead openly placed in common areas, and it can be scary for some people. However, at one point, the people in the photos were filled with life and zeal, and they wanted to commemorate their time together but were now either packed away or left to collect dust.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph"><strong>Who will want to see your social media pictures once you are gone? </strong>We live in a social media society where every event, every moment, and every activity is captured and shared with people we&#8217;ve invited into our friends&#8217; circle or those who self-selected to follow-ups. We live for the likes and comments of our peers and strangers. But once we are gone, will they still want to see and remember the pictures we&#8217;ve found so much joy and, at times, felt so much pride and excitement to share with the world? When the memory post comes up on their feed, will they say a few words of kindness or a moment they spent with you and re-share those memories? I knew her, and she was kind. He was a generous person and a provider. I remember the time when we… Will they be reminiscent of the shared memories you&#8217;ve left behind? Will they even give you a moment of their time? Or will it all be deleted, blocked, and forgotten?</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph"><strong>Who&#8217;s going to want your pictures when you are gone?</strong> Will your children and their children choose to keep your keepsakes, or will they be auctioned off, given away, or destroyed to reduce clutter and allow space for them to create their own memories?</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">I did not know how to respond to their question then, so I said, I am sorry I asked. Now, I know better. The pictures you took while alive are for you and the lucky ones who got to know and loved you. It does not matter if no one wants them after you are gone. It matters that you&#8217;ve lived and lived to the fullest. I should have said, &#8220;I will gladly create a video of every picture I took of you today and make a slide show to be used during your celebration of life event, because you&#8217;ve lived, and had done so to the fullest&#8221;. Even if they forget afterward, when it is about you, they will know that you lived, loved, and had a fantastic adventure while navigating this life. In that moment of celebration and grief, they will know, and you will see that you are loved wherever you are. I know better now, and I want your pictures when you are.</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Closing Note</h2>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">I will want your pictures when you are gone and I am left behind, which shows your vibrancy and life. The silly ones, the sad ones, and even the angry ones, because they are of you. I want those moments of our life as a reminder that I hold memories of you laughing, smiling, joking, and being silly. These are not dreams or stories I invented but moments we lived and shared. I want those laughing videos, you know, the ones that you hated but know you secretly loved. The ones that brought you joy and made you sad. I want to remember those moments because, in the end, it&#8217;s you. </p>
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