One of the most complex aspects of personal growth is navigating our lack of knowledge, ignorance, and experience to gain wisdom. Becoming wise requires a person to have both knowledge (self-learned or formally instructed) and expertise (through implementation, trials, and errors). Both skills are hard to learn, and each draws from a different set of individual skills, characters, and values.
As students, we learn different theories, frameworks, and concepts, but as we enter the real world and apply those lessons, we better understand our blind spots, weaknesses, and strengths. Recently, I had a new experience where I realized how inept I was in communicating my thoughts, wishes, and desires in my decision-making process. I had learned knowledge and thought I knew how I would respond, but dealing with someone with years of expertise regressed my logical and analytical reasoning skills.
Instead of leading and controlling the situation, I felt myself being led and maneuvered, and I struggled to communicate my experience at that time eloquently. In retrospect, I realized I have had many of those experiences growing up. From traveling as an unaccompanied minor from Haiti to the United States, the many first days in schools, learning and practicing a new language, making new friends, and starting and stepping away from a role. As I continue to learn and grow, I will have many instances where I will continue to have similar experiences of ineptitude. One of my favorite quotes, which I try to live by, states:
“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” This quote is often attributed to Steven Covey or Viktor E. Frankl.
Ultimately, how I choose to respond to the challenges ahead will determine my character and the values I care about the most. Identifying the “space” in between when a stimulus is introduced and when a response is needed is the work ahead.